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Jane Austen Writing Lessons. #17: Make Your Characters Active

#17: Make Your Characters Active

Jane Austen Writing Lessons. #17: Make Your Characters Active

In 2012 I created a daily video blog, where every single day I posted a five to thirty second video of something interesting. As I worked on this project, I discovered that only certain categories of things would work for the project:

  1. A still shot (the camera not moving) with something moving inside the frame
  2. A moving shot (the camera moving) with something moving inside the frame
  3. A moving shot (the camera moving) with still objects

The only other option—a still shot with nothing moving—was not actually an option. Because that would be a photograph, not a video.

I quickly discovered that the best videos fit in categories 1 or 2. If something was moving in the frame, it attracted interested, regardless of what I did with the camera. (As a side note, my main claim to internet fame is that Day 119 of my blog—which features a DVD screensaver hitting the corner of the TV screen—has been viewed over 50,000 times.)

TV Screensaver Hitting the Corner of the TV

Our eyes are drawn immediately to things in motion. Our eyes, and often our hearts. This is the power of using active characters.

Readers are drawn to active characters. Active characters are doing. Outside things may happen to them, but they are not just observers or reactors. They do not let themselves be pushed around or be determined by others. They go, they do, they strive.

Making your protagonist an active character creates a powerful story. This propels them on an external journey, through the plot, with all its outward struggle and growth. It also propels them through an internal journey, facilitating character development, with its inner struggle and growth.

Both of the female leads in Sense and Sensibility—the two oldest Dashwood sisters—are active characters. The eldest sister, Elinor, is active—she steers her mother away from renting too expensive of a house, and she does much to ease the pain of others and make their cottage a home. The middle sister, Marianne, is active in a different direction.

Marianne refuses to let others play matchmaker with her future and is guided by her own opinions and philosophies. (Unlike Elinor, she is unafraid of offending others, and not held back by a strong sense of decorum.) She is energetic, and attempts to find and make beauty in the world.

Their cottage is in a beautiful countryside, and on a somewhat blustery day, Marianne encourages her younger sister Margaret to walk with her:

They gaily ascended the downs, rejoicing in their own penetration at every glimpse of blue sky; and when they caught in their faces the animating gales of a high south-westerly wind, they pitied the fears which had prevented their mother and Elinor from sharing such delightful sensations.

“Is there a felicity in the world,” said Marianne, “superior to this?—Margaret, we will walk here at least two hours.”

Their walk, however, is cut short by the driving rain. Marianne is an active character, in charge of her own destiny, but even she cannot prevent the weather. Yet even in reacting to the weather, she resists passivity:

Chagrined and surprised, they were obliged, though unwillingly, to turn back, for no shelter was nearer than their own house. One consolation however remained for them, to which the exigence of the moment gave more than usual propriety; it was that of running with all possible speed down the steep side of the hill which led immediately to their garden gate.

Marianne is delightful because of her energy, her joyous outlook on life, and her refusal to do things in a simple, boring way.

As a result of her action, she hurts her ankle on the hill, and is rescued by a charming gentleman, Mr. Willoughby, who carries her home.

Over the coming chapters, Marianne becomes quite attached to Willoughby. This worries Elinor, who actively encourages Marianne to be more careful with her affections, particularly with how they might be interpreted by others outside of their family. Marianne actively resists Elinor’s advice, and responds:

“You are mistaken, Elinor,” said she warmly, “in supposing I know very little of Willoughby. I have not known him long indeed, but I am much better acquainted with him, than I am with any other creature in the world, except yourself and mama. It is not time or opportunity that is to determine intimacy;—it is disposition alone. Seven years would be insufficient to make some people acquainted with each other, and seven days are more than enough for others. I should hold myself guilty of greater impropriety in accepting a horse from my brother, than from Willoughby. Of John I know very little, though we have lived together for years; but of Willoughby my judgment has long been formed.”

What are the marks of an active character?

An active character:

  • Reaches for their goals or wants

  • Engages in purposeful dialogue that attempts to have impact, persuade, or create change

  • Takes actions—large or small—with purpose

  • When reacting to outside events, asserts themselves and does things their own way

An active character can be bold or shy, outspoken or quiet, and their actions can be grand or minute. But something internal propels them forward.

Yet no character is fully active, and as writers, we shouldn’t consider it a dichotomous choice between active and passive characters. No character is active all of the time—nor should they be. This movement along the spectrum of active and passive can be powerful.

Later on in Sense and Sensibility, Marianne falls into a deep depression, and becomes a largely inactive character. Her moments of activity—like taking a walk in bad weather—do her more harm than good. She becomes ill, which forces further inactivity upon her: at this point it is the doctor’s treatment and fate which determine her future.

Yet the fact that Marianne is generally an active character both creates audience investment in her and helps drive the story forward. Then, in these moments of passivity, we still root for her.

Writing Exercises - Jane Austen Writing Lessons

Exercise 1: The following passage focuses on a passive character:

“You want vanilla?” asked George.

Rudy nodded at her brother. “Sure.” Vanilla was as good as any other flavor.

George ordered and paid. “My treat,” he said. “It’s been way too long.”

“Thanks,” said Rudy.

The server gave them their ice cream and they sat down to a table.

“How’s work going?” asked Rudy.

He told stories about his adventures as a plumber, and some of the crazy things he learned about people’s personal lives.

“How’s work going for you?” asked George.

“Same as always,” said Rudy.

George’s phone rang. He looked at the screen. “Mind if I take this?”

“Not at all.”

He stepped out of the ice cream shop.

Rudy looked around the restaurant at the happy families, happy couples. There was only one person sitting alone, a man about her age. He made eye contact, and she looked down, pretending she hadn’t noticed.

Rewrite the passage to make Rudy a more active character. You could make her more active throughout, or in just one section of the scene. Also, feel free to take the scene in a different direction.

Exercise 2: Read a book or watch a film and analyze the text for active and passive characters. Who is passive? Who is active? Are there moments when characters become more passive or more active, and what is the result? As you analyze, pay particular attention to the protagonist.

Exercise 3: If you’ve drafted a novel or as short story, analyze each scene/chapter for where your main character falls on the spectrum from active to passive. Assign each scene a number from 1 to 10 on a passive to active scale. For the purposes of this exercise, use 10 to mean a character is extremely active, a 7 or 8 for active, a 5 or 6 for scenes with both active and passive elements, a 3 for passive, and a 1 for extremely passive.

Character Scale: Passive to Active Characters (Jane Austen Writing Lessons)

What sort of arc or movement is created by the main character’s movement along the passive-active spectrum? Are there scenes where your character should be more active? Where your character should be more passive? Where your character should be wrestling with both active and passive tendencies in themselves?

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Jane Austen Writing Lessons. #9: Use Dialogue to Create Dynamic Interactions Between Characters

#9: Use Dialogue to Create Dynamic Interactions Between Characters

Jane Austen Writing Lessons. #9: Use Dialogue to Create Dynamic Interactions Between Characters

Dialogue is communication. connection. conversation. conflict. character.

Many of the most quoted Jane Austen quotes come from her characters’ dialogue. Personally, I find that the dialogue between her characters is always engaging and dynamic. She never uses it simply for one character to give information to another character (or to the reader): her dialogue always has a deep impact on the plot, on the characters, and on the subtext.

Consider this scene from her first published novel, Sense and Sensibility. The two sisters, Marianne and Elinor, are in London. Marianne is pining for a man named Mr. Willoughby. Many people assume that Marianne is engaged to Willoughby, but Elinor is unsure, and for chapters has not known how to ask her sister for the truth.

A note was just then brought in, and laid on the table.

“For me?” cried Marianne, stepping hastily forward.

“No, ma’am, for my mistress.”

But Marianne, not convinced, took it instantly up.

“It is indeed for Mrs. Jennings; how provoking!”

“You are expecting a letter then?” said Elinor, unable to be longer silent.

“Yes, a little—not much.”

After a short pause, “you have no confidence in me, Marianne.”

“Nay, Elinor, this reproach from you—you who have confidence in no one!”

“Me!” returned Elinor in some confusion; “indeed, Marianne, I have nothing to tell.”

“Nor I,” answered Marianne with energy, “our situations then are alike. We have neither of us any thing to tell; you, because you do not communicate, and I, because I conceal nothing.”

Elinor, distressed by this charge of reserve in herself, which she was not at liberty to do away, knew not how, under such circumstances, to press for greater openness in Marianne.

There are four core components that make this dialogue effective:

  • What the characters say

  • How the characters say it

  • What the characters don’t say

  • What the characters do

Dialogue Component #1: What the characters say

What the characters say

Sometimes two characters will have the same goal or objective for a conversation, but often, characters have different goals.

In this scene, Elinor’s primary goal is to discover the truth from Marianne so she can better help her sister. She takes the opportunity to question Marianne, inviting her to open herself up and confide in her. However, telling Marianne “you have no confidence in me” does not have the intended effect and puts Marianne on the offensive.

Marianne’s original goal is to conceal her anxieties about her relationship with Willoughby: she does not want her older sister’s judgment or advice. To this is added the goal of pointing out Elinor’s hypocrisy. She knows that Elinor, too, is keeping things from her, and while stating this does not lead to Elinor opening up to Marianne, it does achieve Marianne’s ultimate goal of ending the conversation quickly.

When characters have different goals for a conversation, it creates organic and compelling dialogue with forward movement and momentum. (This is true even if the characters have similar goals: character’s goals will never entirely overlap, and this will be reflected in what they say.)

How the characters say it

Most of how the characters are talking, such as their tone and their volume, is implied by the dialogue itself. For instance, the exclamation mark and the sentence structure indicate the way in which Marianne speaks the following line:

“It is indeed for Mrs. Jennings; how provoking!”

Skilled writers like Austen reveal most of how the characters speak by the speech itself, without relying heavily on description. Jane Austen does give several additional descriptions, such as cried Marianne, but if these sorts of qualifiers were used on every line, it would clutter and distract.

In this passage, Austen gives two more brief descriptions of how the characters are speaking: “returned Elinor in some confusion” and “answered Marianne with energy.” These descriptions occur in brief succession, and this contrasting pair paints a portrait of the two sisters, demonstrating even in this short moment how the sisters acts as foils to each other.

What the characters don’t say

In any conversation, there are a multitude of things left unsaid: motivations and emotions, backstory and baggage. Very few people are entirely open in conversation, even to those who are closest to them. (When characters are finally open with each other, it can create huge emotional resonance for readers.)

What the characters choose not to say has a huge impact on the dialogue. In this scene from Sense and Sensibility, the very subject of the conversation is what they refuse to tell each other. In addition to not talking about their secrets, they do not talk about how irritated they are with each other. This is fueled by their frustration with their situations, and a latent sense of hopelessness, especially for Marianne, but also for Elinor.

Often we see characters’ biggest desires and anxieties in what the characters choose not to say, or find themselves unable to say, and this can help create dynamic interactions.

What the characters do

Generally, actions are peppered throughout dialogue scenes, and are just as important as the words that people say.

In this scene, Marianne’s actions betray how much she is hoping for a letter from Willoughby. Her haste in stepping forward underlines her impatience and longing, and she cannot trust the word of the servant—she must pick the letter up herself to see that it is truly not for her.

Inaction can be as important as inaction. Note the power in Elinor’s pause before she makes her accusation:

“You are expecting a letter then?” said Elinor, unable to be longer silent.

“Yes, a little—not much.”

After a short pause, “you have no confidence in me, Marianne.”

This pause provides a space for Elinor to decide to push the subject, and it provides a space for the reader as we watch the characters struggle through this interaction. A different sort of pause comes at the end of the scene when Elinor does not know what to say and we glimpse her internal thoughts.

Dialogue should be used to create dynamic interactions between characters.

In dialogue, writers weave together the said, the unsaid, and action to create character interactions which should be dynamic, or in other words, should possess energy and life. This sort of dialogue is kinetic, in that it creates change and progress (though this be negative progress, moving the characters away from their goals).

Conflict and tension are created by dialogue when the character’s various wants and goals rub up against each other. Connection is created when the dialogue changes the characters’ relationship in a positive way. Ultimately, dialogue is communication, but it is also so much more: it moves the plot forward and provides characters with a way to manifest their personalities and move toward their goals.

Writing Exercises - Jane Austen Writing Lessons

Exercise 1: Take a book off your shelf and open it to a random page. Find the first sentence of dialogue on the page and use it as the first line of a conversation you write for brand new characters. Make sure to consider what the characters say, what the characters don’t say, and the actions of the characters.

(There is also a random dialogue generator online that can be used for this exercise.)

Exercise 2:

Write a short passage of dialogue (approximately 3-5 lines/paragraphs), featuring two characters, a girl who wants to buy a lollipop from a candy shop, and a guardian who is trying to save money and wants to get home and rest after a long day.

You will write this passage three different times:

For the first version of the dialogue, have both characters say exactly what they want.

For the second version of the dialogue, have one of the characters say exactly what they want, while the other character does not say what they want, but nevertheless tries to achieve what they want.

For the third version of the dialogue, neither character should say exactly what they want, yet both are trying to achieve their own goals.

In each version of the dialogue, consider how the character is speaking, and what actions they might take, as well as if any pauses would occur.

Exercise 3:

It’s easy to overwrite dialogue and include more than is necessary. Take a scene of dialogue that you have drafted and cut out at least 25% of the spoken sentences (you can cut out individual words too, but as you do so, make sure that you don’t lose your characters’ distinct voices).

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#3: Use an Inciting Incident to Set the Plot in Motion

One of my all-time favorite films is Austenland. It’s a comedy about a woman named Jane who spends her savings to stay at an all-inclusive, Jane Austen-themed resort. At one point in the film, she and another character, Mr. Nobley, find themselves running.

Mr. Nobley asks, “Why are we running?”

Jane replies, “Because a man and a woman should never be alone unless they are in motion.”

Just like characters in the Regency period (or anyone in an immersive Jane Austen experience), stories themselves should not be at rest.

Stories are generally about motion, they are about change and development, both in terms of character and plot. Yet as humans, we are stationary beings. We do what we have been doing: we stay still, or, if we have a path, we stick to that path unless something changes.

An inciting incident is an event that carries weight for the main character and creates the opportunity for change, both internally and externally. An inciting incident often introduces forces outside of the main character’s control, and is a disruption that requires the main character to adapt and grow and interact with others in new ways. An inciting incident often relates, in some way, to the main themes or conflicts of the novel.

1884 cover of Sense and Sensibility, from the British Library

In Sense and Sensibility, Mr. Dashwood’s death changes everything for Mrs. Dashwood and her daughters, Elinor, Marianne, and Margaret. Yet for a time, they stay in stasis, continuing to live on the estate that has been their home. Yet it is no longer really their home: Mrs. Dashwood’s stepson, Mr. John Dashwood, and his wife, Fanny Dashwood, are the new owners. Fanny in particular makes the elder Mrs. Dashwood and her daughters unwelcome, especially once she notices that her brother, Edward Ferrars, is interested in Elinor. She rudely confronts Mrs. Dashwood on the subject, and Mrs. Dashwood decides that they will withdraw from the estate:

To quit the neighborhood of Norland was no longer an evil; it was an object of desire; it was a blessing, in comparison of the misery of continuing her daughter-in-law’s guest: and to remove for ever from that beloved place would be less painful than to inhabit or visit it while such a woman was its mistress.

As they leave, Marianne wails a lament:

“Dear, dear Norland! when shall I cease to regret you!—when learn to feel a home elsewhere!—Oh! happy house, could you know what I suffer in now viewing you from this spot, from whence perhaps I may view you no more!….you will remain the same; unconscious of the pleasure or the regret you occasion, and insensible of any change in those who walk under your shade!—But who will remain to enjoy you?”

This forced eviction takes the Dashwoods on a physical journey—to a new county, where they live in a cottage and meet a whole set of new people. In addition to a physical journey, it’s also a journey to try to find home and to see if they can survive losing almost everything that they find dear. This journey starts both Marianne and Elinor on internal journeys; Marianne is full of sensibility and unrestrained emotion, but must learn how to let more than her emotions govern her; Elinor has a bit too much sense, and keeps too much inside her, not allowing herself to want and hope for the things she really desires.

While some inciting incidents lead to physical journeys, like in Sense and Sensibility, a physical journey is not required. For instance, in Emma the inciting incident is the marriage of Emma’s governess. Emma’s internal and external journeys are captivating, but they do not require her to leave her home (the furthest she goes is Box Hill, which is only seven miles away).

Change is at the heart of interesting plots, and the possibility for change is why we root for characters. A good inciting incident sets the plot in motion and paves the way for the rest of the story.

Writing Exercises - Jane Austen Writing Lessons

Exercise 1: Choose one of your favorite books or movies. What is the inciting incident? How does this event change things for the main character and start them on a journey? Share your thoughts in the comments.

Exercise 2: In the following paragraph, a character is pursuing something she wants: the opportunity to be the pianist for the high school musical. Add an inciting incident, something that will disrupt and change things for Luciana. For the purposes of this exercise, keep it short—anywhere from a sentence to a full paragraph. Once you’ve written the inciting incident, consider how it would change the character’s trajectory and what sort of story might result from it.

Luciana ran her fingers up and down the keys of an imaginary piano. She had been preparing for this audition for months, and now the time had finally come. She closed the book and looked at her hands. They were warm, they were flexible, and they were ready. She would be chosen as the accompanist for the high school musical this year, surely. She waited impatiently for her turn on the grand piano, but she need not have worried. Luciana played the music flawlessly, and the music director gave her an assuring smile as she left the room.

Exercise 3: Take a new story idea, one that you haven’t yet developed. Spend a few minutes brainstorming an inciting incident, or, if you prefer discovery writing, write an opening scene and see what inciting incident will put your character in motion or change her direction.

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